The pitfalls of dating in North Korea

A North Korean couple on a date in Pyongyang.

Working for the Ministry of People’s Security, which is responsible for law and order within North Korea, night patrol teams roam the streets after dark. One of the prime responsibilities of this night patrol is to act as ’Dating Police’. It is their duty to act as law enforcement with regards to ‘assaults against public decency’. For this reason, there are many unexpected pitfalls to dating in North Korea.

In North Korea, money alone won’t get you into a motel or hotel, as you must show your identification documents. If the guests can’t prove they are a married couple, they are not able to share a room. Even if a couple happened to bribe their way in, such obvious sites for a secret getaway are frequently inspected by patrols who are on the lookout for illegal guests. This is why motels or hotels are considered as most unsuitable as far as privacy is concerned.

Some traders earn a living on the side by opening private homes up to North Korean couples who are looking for a suitable place to go on a date; meanwhile, other North Korean couples choose to have their date in the mountains, amid ruins or in abandoned buildings.

Nevertheless, officers in the Ministry of People’s Security are not stupid. In fact, it is said that more officers spend their time seeking couples out on a date than on other forms of law enforcement. This is partly because such couples are easy targets of bribery and blackmail.

North Korean exile Kim Hong-bo worked as an officer for the Ministry of People’s Security. He told us, “We would take bribes and promise not to expose the couple’s crime.” Blackmail would be used to threaten the couple if they protested that they were in a legitimate relationship. For example, the officers would threaten to ask neighbours in the case of older adults, or their schools in the case of students.

After the student’s educational establishment is notified, a member of the Youth League will call the student in question and interrogate them. Even students at the university level are considered under-age for the purposes of dating; and their dating activities count as ‘assaults against public decency’. Furthermore, their professors must be notified of their moral crimes.

If a relationship is discovered to be illicit in yet another dimension such as this, the officers can demand a larger bribe in return for letting them go. This means there are strong incentives for night patrols to remain vigilant for couples who are dating in North Korea. This works especially well in a society where couples would rather pay a bribe than be stained by an accusation.

Ultimately, whether the date involves a couple in a legitimate relationship or in an ‘illicit’ relationship, the night patrol officers have a right to expose the couple if they are found to be unmarried. Being subject to such controls, it is no surprise that dating in North Korea can entangle a couple in cases of blackmail and bribery.